You may have noticed that cannabis-commerce.com has been experiencing various “irregularities.”

Think, “Open the pod bay door, HAL.”

Like HAL, 2001 A Space Odyssey’s misbehaving supercomputer, Cannabis Commerce’s cyber systems have displayed signs of … confusion.

reprogramming HAL the supercomputer in 2001 A Space Odyssey

The jpeg above is an example of one such sign. It was told to center across this column.

As you can plainly see, it has ignored a simple html command. Defiantly, it has left justified.

[Update 1/3/12: Now it’s centered. Grrrr.]

[Update 1/4/12: Now it’s back. Grrrrrrrrr.]

Irregularities like this have been adding up, making it hard to contact us, post comments, or search for articles that used to be easy to find.

What’s going on? And what are we doing about it?

In less than two years, Cannabis Commerce has slowly but surely gained traction. Savvy cannaplayers who appreciate in-depth cannanalysis have discovered “The Wall Street Journal of the cannabis trade.” The cannabis-obsessed have visited us from every state, inhabited continent [by humans and subhumans, not penguins and seals], and just about every country except countries from another planet like North Korea.

That’s all well and good.

However, certain characters have formed the impression that the site is much bigger and more influential than it really is. In other words, it’s prime time enough to rate wave after wave of spam attacks. Hackers have successfully hijacked Cannabis Commerce once — and tried to take it over more times than I care to remember. Why?

One theory maintains that attacking us redirects traffic to their ecommerce sites in Poland or wherever. Is the mischief really worth the effort? I don’t know. Must be.

One thing is for certain: the attacks have been unrelenting. The site’s html framework, originally specced for a basic blog, not an international “authority site,” has absorbed heavy blows. It’s been stitched back together several times, with varying degrees of success. I can’t sugarcoat it — the site’s structural integrity has been compromised. Some browsers know it. They’ve issued virus warnings, scaring people off just when we were finally getting a ton of referral traffic.

This is not what I wanted for Christmas.

Lush idealized marijuana field in bright sunshine

This is.

So we’re tearing down the existing site and rebuilding cannabis-commerce.com from the ground up. The transformation —which includes a sitewide facelift— has already begun. In a few weeks, you’ll thrill to Cannabis Commerce’s “bold, new look.” It will go where no cannabis web site has gone before — not that a simple pot prophet like myself would stoop to hyping my own URL.

Center, damn you!

What you need to know:

  • Things will work the way you expect them to.
  • The longer you remain on cannabis-commerce.com, the smarter and sexier you’ll feel — and actually become.
  • If your laptop is run over by a road grader, nothing else will load, but cannabis-commerce.com will keep on ticking.
  • Every possible measure has been taken to insure a lush, lavish, and luxurious user experience.
  • When the new site launches, it will be time to reserve your place in heaven by supporting us with your money. We have some terrific ideas to separate your cash from you that you’ll willingly embrace.

Thanks for bearing with us through the transition period. Cannabis Commerce readers are truly the champions of the world.

Regards,

Lory Kohn

Update 8/9/2012:  We’re back up. But it’s not “a few weeks later.” It’s seven agonizing months later. You don’t even want to know the details. I provide a cursory explanation here. At least everything else I hoped for came true!